In Response
Posted January 31st, 2007 by Matthew in CommentsThere’s been a lot of chatter over on the last blog entry. So, I hope to set the record straight once and for all about a few things:
There is no Matt and Dave’s Adventure in Africa. There is also no Dave and Matt’s Adventure in Africa. Doesn’t exist. Dave and I have never been there, no matter how many times fledgling porn producers have asked us to go.
All of this talk of “documentary” and “Ace” and “Joey” are all just figments of people’s collective imagination.
There is no ‘other first feature’. I’m also assuming that there is no Charles Bukowski. I have no idea what that means. In fact, I may just delete this whole post.
Corinne, you do have the final copy of SIP, as that was the only part that we were able to edit. The rest of it is lost to time.
And we’ll start doing documentary’s about imaginary “movies” when we start having enough fans to consistently pull 50+ comments on the videos each week. Or when we’re showcased on Rocketboom or something of the like. Tom, Tony, NotJim (people who I’m pretty sure we don’t know), and hell even Ellen (who we don’t really know anymore), are a good start. But we’ve got a long way to go Dave and imaginary Joey. Start getting the name out there more.
This, of course, doesn’t apply to the documentary that we will be shooting about Gavin - greatest actor of our time. Gavin has his own legion of fans, both here and overseas from what I hear. In fact, the only reason Gavin doesn’t have his own website is that any ISP would crumble from the sheer volume of traffic it would recieve every day. There is only one man who could play Tak Jansen. There is only one man who scares Chuck Norris. There is only one man who can woo all the ladies as ‘The Generous Lover’. And that man is Gavin Mead.
Now, the Great Unicorn War of ‘02? That is completely true. Much blood was shed, and many stories from that grisly conflict still haunt us.
Perhaps…
someday…
we’ll tell those stories…
Matthew
December 31st, 1969 at 4:00 pm
Weird. Because I seem to have some distant, vague memory of writing down timecode while some girl shouted, “But there is diseases in Africa” over and over again while I scribbled furiously and muttered to myself, “Are! There ARE diseases in Africa.”
It was probably just a dream I had though.
December 31st, 1969 at 4:00 pm
It’s safer if it stays that way (you not knowing me). I was a High Priestess in the Great Unicorn War of ‘02 and I have only appropriated the identity of this “Ellen” for tax purposes.
The only other thing you need to know is that Charles Bukowski is dead.
December 31st, 1969 at 4:00 pm
It’s safer if it stays that way (you not knowing me). I was a High Priestess in the Great Unicorn War of ‘02 and I have only appropriated the identity of this “Ellen” for tax purposes.
The only other thing you need to know is that Charles Bukowski is dead.
December 31st, 1969 at 4:00 pm
Oh, Ellen… how naive. Bukowski isn’t dead. He just wants you to think so. For tax purposes.
And drinking purposes, of course.
And Gavin is huge in Denmark.
And his pants.
DCW
December 31st, 1969 at 4:00 pm
Gav, you stud! And Dave, I am so happy with your responses today; it’s the most I’ve read from you in eons. So humorous, too, that it’s worth the wait. Thanks!
Since there’s no “(Insert Name)’s Adventures in Africa,” why don’t you just make one? Surely g14’s budget would cover it by now. . .
December 31st, 1969 at 4:00 pm
I’m sorry, do we give you the impression that we have some sort of budget that we shoot these things with?
HA! GUYS! THEY’RE FALLING FOR IT!
…oops.
Matthew
December 31st, 1969 at 4:00 pm
“What matters most is how well you walk through the fire.”
-Bukowski
PS. I’ve heard that about Gavin. If you’re doing a documentary about this legendary actor, be sure to include his monologue on sticking a stopwatch up his ass for five years.
December 31st, 1969 at 4:00 pm
This is a test. This is only a test. Had this been an actual blog entry, there would be more words.
December 31st, 1969 at 4:00 pm
Jeff, I was wondering where you were. What’s so important that you can’t contribute more? I hope you won’t use that tired old, “I’m working all the time and when I’m not, I’m writing, acting in, directing and editing g14 films” excuse. We (by that, I mean I) demand more!
December 31st, 1969 at 4:00 pm
JKfC– it’s because I’m in mourning for the fallen hero Tak Jansen. I weep everyday for our loss. And it’s been crazy busy at work. But that’s no excuse for my lack of posting. Ok– thoughts in no particular order. I feel that I’m the only person that can actually confirm there is NO Dave & Matt or Matt & Dave in Africa. No such thing. I’ve been a part of g14 for many years, and have never seen such mythical footage. Because it DOES. NOT. EXIST.
Nope. None.
And Ellen, if you were truly a High Priestess in the Great Unicorn War of Aught Two, then you have declared yourself my blood enemy. Beware my drunken blade.
And “Office Rivalry” should be coming soon.
Peace, Love and Donuts!
Jeff